Have You Experienced a Non-event?
My last post started my searching for a favorite book of mine that deals with the topic of getting unstuck and I found it sitting proudly on my well-organized book shelf.
In the book Going to Plan B: How You Can Cope, Regroup and Start Your Life on a New Path (Fireside 1996) the authors define a non-event as “…simply the event that doesn’t happen. It is also the event that you reasonably expect will happen, and its absence can change your life.”
Nancy K. Schlossberg and Susan Porter Robinson wrote this excellent book and I must admit that I have read the whole book several times. They suggest like Gail Blanke, sited in my last post, that you need to go through a process in order to cope with life’s non-events. They call it “The Dream Reshaping Process”. This process also begins with acknowledging the non-event and adds easing (ways of managing the stress created), refocusing (letting go) and reshaping (new dreams).
They state “It is in that process that hope can emerge and in the striving that new dreams are found.”
Have you finished that inventory of your “incompletes” from the past yet? You might be surprised what you learn from the exercise.
“If you don’t like something change it; if you can’t change it, change the way you think about it.” ~Mary Engelbreit
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